dozens of calls away.
(listen to avril's Nobody's Home while reading this)
i therefore conclude that i'm the world's biggest fool.
how stupid could i be.
to even have a slightest flicker of hope in me.
stupid, stupid munirah.
face it. face the awful truth. swallow it. c'mon. you've been in this shithole before remember? now its just numb. this is what you're gonna get over and over again. so why love? when you know it will bloody hell turn its tables on you. like signing a deal with Lucifer himself. in the end, no matter how much you try and try, it doesnt matter at all. you cant make the person return the amount of love you have for him.then you ask yourself, what did you do to deserve such punishment?
simple.
because you care too much.so next time, just dont give a damn. act expensive. act as though you dont need the person. go do many sad and OTT things like fucking some guy you dont know and dont tell the person at all. let the person know through someone else(or better still, from the guy you just fucked). let him be shocked, and let him be angry but thrilled to pine for you more. because itsnt that what makes a man chase after a woman more? then again, why go the extreme and hurt yourself more? you can say this logic is dumb, but i tell you, face it, this is reality.
the more the girl ignores him, the more he'll go after her. and he'll close one eye to the other girls who are so in love with him and would do anything for him. isnt this fact true? look around you. just take a wide look around.
painful huh?
yeah.
this is just too numbing. so many tensions everywhere,even at home. these wounds..God, they're opening again. i need fresh air. i badly need a hug too.
mother, i miss you. i need you, mother. where are you, mother? there's no one else to hug me, mother.. where are you? when i can feel true love,mother? God, okay dont cry now. SHIT.
be strong, be strong, you woman.
time to put on that mask again.
for isnt life anything but a sham?
good day. time to see my darling yishun girl.
p.s.: to you. im sorry, no matter how much i love you, i just cant give my whole heart to you. its still there attached to him. no matter how he hurts me so. its not fair, i know, but hasnt life been unfair afterall? i hope you'll understand.. its up to you now to stay or leave.. i cant promise you anything but i can promise you something, that i will always be grateful and will always care for you.i miss you so..
p.p.s: the offer to buy me a motorola rzr will be open till the end of this dec. so act now! make me smile. hah.
come away with me..
11:29 AM
